communication
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As US secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said, “There are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns—the ones we don’t know we don’t know. And if one looks throughout the history…
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Why did I choose this tool? Neuro Linguistic Programming is often used as a method of changing behavior and subconscious programming. I don’t always favor this approach because I believe that change should be conscious as much as possible and that we should be in control of how and when we change something. Of course, in order to change anything,…
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Why did I choose this tool? My upbringing was one that generally vilified negative emotions, particularly anger and disgust, and glorified the positive emotions such as happiness, contentment and love. What I came to understand later on in life is that the negative emotions, including anger and disgust, are actually part and parcel of a life of happiness and contentment,…
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Why did I choose this tool? Many times, I have made the mistake of attempting to solve an issue by “attacking those involved”, even though I wouldn’t call it that. And I’ve also seen others do it. The results are generally negative, people feel hurt, lash out, they attack back, the conversation stops and any attempt to communicate or learn…
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Why did I choose this tool? I chose this tool because it gives some clarity on what can be a bit of a fuzzy topic – listening. It makes points that are easy to understand and makes it a bit easier to look inside yourself and others. Awareness is power, so merely the awareness can help us change our listening…
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Why did I choose this tool? This is one of the foundational exercises in my personal work. It has helped me realize what people might be struggling with and within seconds, helps me have a better emotional connection to them. It has helped me reframe relationships with my ex-girlfriend, my mother, my best friend, my ex-boss, and many others. It…
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Why did I choose this tool? I believe that one of the most important parts of creating a safe space is to let people know that they have the permission to feel whatever it is that they’re feeling. I chose this tool because I love simple tools that are easy to remember and yet sometimes difficult to put into practice.…
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Why did I choose this tool? My ex-girlfriend and I used to struggle in conversations because I would often interrupt her. I would have a tendency to speak more quickly than her and therefore say something before she started to speak or before she had finished speaking. At times, we would set rules for ourselves to go into “journalist mode,”…
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Why did I choose this tool? I chose this tool because of its simplicity as an introduction to the educational relationship that can be achieved while working with groups of (young) people. In order to establish a relationship with a learner as a skill, the main approaches for creating professional relationship need to be internalized, practiced and reflected. How does…
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